ONLY AUSSIES

Being Australian is about driving in a German car  To an Irish pub for A Belgian beer,  Then on the way home, grabbing an Indian curry  Or A Turkish kebab, to sit on Swedish furniture and  Watch American shows on a Japanese TV.  Oh and....  Only in Australia ...  Can a pizza get to your house faster  Than an  ambulance Only in Australia ... Do supermarkets make  Sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop  To get milk while healthy people  Can buy cigarettes at the front. Only in Australia ...  Do people order double cheeseburgers,  Large fries and a DIET coke.  Only in Australia ...  Do banks leave both doors wide open  And chain the pens to the counters.  Only in Australia ...  Do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars  In the driveway and  lock our junk and cheap lawn mower  In the garage. NOT TO MENTION.... In the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth. A massive 543 Aussies were admitted to Emergency  And finally......... In 2000 eight Aussies cracked their skull  Whilst throwing up into the toilet.